Monday, February 20, 2006

Night offering

take a drink
of
water

breathe

watch the flame
of
the candle

flicker

take a drink
of
my heart

breathe

watch the flame
of
my soul

flicker

17 Comments:

Blogger Jean said...

Très belle , très pure poésie .
J'aime sa musique , ses reprises , son balancement .

"prenez la boisson
de
mon coeur
respirez

observez la flamme
de
mon âme
clignotement ."

C'est très beau !
C'est l'ivresse !!!!

2/20/2006 9:13 AM  
Blogger Jean said...

Le peintre , le musicien , le poète , tous ceux qui aiment la beauté sous tous ses aspects , parlent la même langue , partagent la même émotion sans avoir recours aux mots .
(La poésie fait semblant d'utiliser les mots , elle est bien au delà )

Je vibre à ta poèsie comme tu aimes mes couleurs ..
Nous partageons ....avec tous .

2/20/2006 9:24 AM  
Blogger garnet david said...

I've been feeling just that way about somone recently. This little poem is the tonic I needed.

J'aime aussi let mots et les idées de Jean. Je manque la culture française.

2/20/2006 9:36 AM  
Blogger Mary said...

(o)

2/20/2006 11:17 AM  
Blogger T L Reynolds said...

I love concise writing like this. There is so much emotion and movement packed in this little piece.

2/20/2006 11:38 AM  
Blogger mermaid said...

The dancing flame. Sometimes it has so much light in its steadfast burning, and other times it collapses under the weight of darkness.

I like the different styles of poetry you have been wearing lately.

2/20/2006 5:34 PM  
Blogger Brenda said...

The symmetry here works perfectly, but the second half expands and creates a whole new universe based on fragility...

2/20/2006 5:49 PM  
Blogger Gemma Grace said...

This gem touches me on so many layers. Intimate, profound, telling.

2/20/2006 9:00 PM  
Blogger alan said...

The flame
from
your work
lights
my soul!

alan

2/21/2006 2:03 AM  
Blogger Rexroth's Daughter said...

I love the balance of intensity and sparseness of this poem.

2/21/2006 8:13 AM  
Anonymous yllstonewolf said...

powerful and succinct. like a meditation.

2/21/2006 8:26 AM  
Blogger leslee said...

How elegant.

2/21/2006 1:57 PM  
Blogger MB said...

Ce que vous dites ici me plait beacoup, Jean, un grand merci! Je crois que vous avez raison.

Garnet, I never know how these bits I post will be received or who is going to respond to what (or not) so I'm glad to know it was a tonic for you.

Thank you, Mary.

TLReynolds, thanks for stopping by. I'm pleased you enjoyed this poem.

Mermaid, I suppose there have been a few different styles recently. I don't think of it that way, consciously, I just write... and am sometimes amazed and sometimes amused by what comes out!

Brenda, I appreciate that you picked up on the fragility.

Gemma Grace, thank you for such kind words.

Alan, what a wonderful way to respond!

RD, an intensity and sparseness not that far flung from haiku, perhaps!

Anne, and Leslee, thank you very much. I'm honored you see it that way.

2/21/2006 5:36 PM  
Blogger Frankie said...

Beautiful. I love the soft rhythmic pattern. So simple and so complex. Beautiful.

2/24/2006 8:52 PM  
Blogger Richard Lawrence Cohen said...

Ah, yes! And the last stanza is inspired.

2/25/2006 7:14 AM  
Blogger MB said...

Frankie, and Richard, thank you.

2/25/2006 9:11 AM  
Blogger Thunderowl said...

So beautifull...
I wouldn't be suprised if this poem gets into a poetry "Guinness book of world records"!

3/23/2006 4:23 PM  

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